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Having a Fox 4 Moment

We drag the river for stuff you didn't know you were missing.

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Hip-hop MC Priceless Diamonds describes herself as a "boss bitch" who grew up boosting clothes and turning the occasional trick. She's no angel, but she's got advice. This week, she offers the second installment of the Priceless Gift Guide, because even boss bitches love the holidays.

For your favorite bouncer:

A good pair of Timberlands from Harold Pener at the Landing mall. For your sweetheart's mom:

A full-length cashmere coat with a hat to match from Reruns in Westport. For your Boo:

I'm getting my Nasty a watch from Jacob and Company and a Whale T-shirt from Wax Factory in Kansas. Whale is Rich the Factor's clothing line. Oh, and a suite for a weekend at Great Wolf Lodge in Wyandotte County. It's romantic! There aren't as many kids as you'd think, and there are bars everywhere. It's cool. For your best friend:

A jogging suit from the Chiefs store on the Plaza. They are not all red velour. They got some cute stuff in there. I was shocked. For baby's daddy's sister's cousin who hangs out at the house all the time:

A big box of 100 Swisher Sweets from Berbiglia. For the friend pregnant with her fifth baby:

A big box of Magnum condoms from your local drugstore. For Grandma, who lives in Wichita:

A photo collage of the family and a crystal angel from Swarovski on the Plaza. For the bosses at the Pitch:

Tickets to the Grammys with me in February. For Mom:

Pay the ABIA insurance on her car for six months. For my brother in jail:

Fried chicken, mashed potatoes and greens for food day, and then $100 on his jail account. Knowing my brother gambles behind bars, that will be gone in one night.

Got a question only Priceless can answer? E-mail her at boss.bitch@pitch.com.

Having a Fox 4 Moment
Here's a dilemma for the Fox 4 Problem Solvers: The station's Web site has left us giggling in our cubes lately at head-scratchin' headlines and some curious common-sense advice.

It started with this headline: "KU gets praise for classes on creationism." Actually, University of Kansas professor Paul Mirecki's proposed class on intelligent design didn't earn him praise; it landed him in the hot seat — and in the hospital.

On November 28, Fox 4 relayed a gem in a story titled "Teen's nude picture turns up in e-mail." In a tragic tale of heartbreak, a young girl snaps a butt-ass-naked self-portrait and sends it to her beau; then they break up, and the picture turns up in mommy's inbox. The story dropped this bit of knowledge from police: "The only thing to do is never take off your clothes when someone takes a picture of you or you take a picture of yourself."

But our favorite Fox 4 moment belongs to traffic guy Nick Vasos. Morning anchor Mark Alford was giving Vasos trouble for his spiffy sweater. Vasos didn't hold back: "Mark, you've got so many things in the closet, among other things." Alford didn't bite, but we're hoping Vasos might spice up his traffic reports with a few of his co-workers' secrets.

Turn to Page ... Zzzz
Leon Daggett's eyes started to droop just after 11 a.m., about three hours into a Kansas City, Kansas, Board of Public Utilities budget meeting December 14. It was just the start of his very public nap.

As a utility official droned on about cooling towers, transformer work and generators, it looked as though Daggett, the utility's general manager, might not make it. His eyes closed for a good five seconds. He took a long swig from his can of Diet Dr Pepper. He rubbed his temples and leaned back, folding his hands on his belly. Daggett blinked, and his eyes opened halfway. He blinked again. Zzzzzzzz.

The general manager snapped to attention, fumbled with his watch, checked the time and rubbed his eyes. It was 11:05 a.m.

Daggett sighed deeply, then picked up his soda before realizing he'd finished it. The caffeine wasn't kicking in. A couple of minutes later, the GM's eyes closed again, then snapped open when somebody ordered everyone to turn to page 20. Daggett leaned in to look at the budget, hiding his eyes with his hand on his forehead. A minute passed, and he snuck a peek at his watch: 11:22 a.m.

He stayed focused for a bit as the meeting moved to cover general management services, but by 11:38 a.m., he was fading again. His eyes closed; his head bobbed.

At 11:45 a.m., he looked desperately at the wall clock while a woman discussed a sinkhole off Eighth Street. By 11:48 a.m., Daggett had dozed off twice more before jerking awake. He stared into the audience and fought hard until 11:54 a.m., when he looked at the wall clock a final time.

At 11:58 a.m., the meeting broke for lunch. It seemed not a minute too soon for Daggett, who let out a long yawn before quickly turning to the break room to recoup his strength for the afternoon session.

Daggett responded to questions from the Pitch with a one-sentence e-mail that read: "I was not dozing." Perhaps he kept it short so he'd have time for a nap.
Cry-o-Meter

CorrectionsPotential for tears:

8 out of 10 :

All eyes turn to Arrowhead on Christmas Eve, where another hand signal from Gunther "F-you" Cunningham could make anybody cry. A loss to Ol' Gleamy Eyes, Marty Schottenheimer, could dash Coach V's playoff hopes. Vermeil's corneas will go glassy for whatever Santa (victory, defeat, a nutty Pinot) brings.

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