5. Wear clothes you intend on washing. Some may say smoke is a sweet smell, but that just means they likely have a smoker in the backyard. Perfume companies don't look to chimneys for inspiration for a reason.
4. Ramp up your meat intake in the previous 48 hours. Barbecue is an assault on your stomach and senses. An avalanche of smoked meats comes with a heavy toll, so give your body a preview of what's about to happen by eating meat at least once a day in the two days prior.
3. Order what they say they do best. Every barbecue joint has a specialty. It's usually what they actually are best at smoking. Balance this rule by looking at plates around the restaurant and your own hunger.
2. Save your napkins until the end. Barbecue makes you messy, and your instinct is to be polite and wipe away some of that sauce. It's the wrong instinct. Like any good smoker, your fingers will get seasoned over the course of your meal, and a slippery plastic glass of red pop is worth the risk.
1. Don't eat your ribs with a fork and knife. No fork and knifing your pizza slices and no utensils with barbecue. Use your fingertips and your teeth to take apart whatever you're facing. If the meat requires a knife and fork, you're in the wrong joint.
What are your other rules for eating barbecue?