“Obesity Lives Here” ... And Other Touching Game Memories




A fan caught the scripted insanity of ESPN’s

College GameDay at Arrowhead.

In the aftermath of Saturday’s big game, here’s the only post-game analysis you need. And by “analysis,” I really mean my random thoughts about things other than yards and downs.

I sat through ESPN’s College GameDay, which broadcast that morning from the Arrowhead lot. The GameDay crew divided Kansas and Missouri fans into two sections that were separated by an aisle. Both sides brought clever signs. On the Kansas side, I liked the cutout of Grandpa Simpson. Near it was a talky bubble with his famous quote, “I’ll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missourah!” (For Simpsons nerds, that’s from the “Gummi Venus de Milo” episode, when Homer’s accused of sexually harassing the babysitter. In it, Marge asks Grandpa why his American flag has 49 stars; hence, his response).

Missouri and KU fans clearly put a lot of thought into their signs, which included:


  • “Obesity Lives Here.” OK, that’s a cheap shot about Mangino’s weight, but the play on ESPN’s “College Football Lives Here” slogan is still kind of funny.
  • “Kansas Football: A Tradition Since September.”
  • A cutout of Mangino’s head accompanied by another massive cutout of a cupcake with a Mizzou logo on it.

During GameDay, the Mangino-cupcake was standing on the Kansas side. I was confused by that – where these Kansas fans implying that Mangino plays cupcake teams? Or were they Missouri fans who crossed the Home Depot-sponsored border and infiltrated the Kansas section? My boyfriend figured out that they meant that Mizzou’s a cupcake team. Apparently, the Star was confused, too; it printed a picture of these guys in Sunday’s paper and identified them as Mizzou fans (even though they’re clearly wearing KU shirts).

After the game, I also sat through Channel 9’s hilariously awful post-game broadcast. Here’s a brief rundown of its painfulness:

  • KMBC’s Jim Flink interviews sports guy Andy Fales for like 10 minutes in a post-game circle jerk. They’re standing on the field, right in front of one of those crane-operated cameras. Jim starts of by saying something like, “It’s bedlam here!” Behind them, beyond the crane, the stadium is clearing out. Jim sounds like he’s auditioning for ESPN, as evidenced by his use of the term “big daddy mo.” Apparently, in sports dork talk, that means “momentum.” Hey guys, we just watched the game too. How about interviewing some players instead of each other?
  • After the Jim-n-Andy show, the news switched to the standard “fan reaction” story. It cut to reporter Marcus Moore, who was supposedly at a raucous gamewatch at someone’s apartment up north. Yeah, behind him were six guys sitting on sofas. This just in: Sausagefest in NKC! Marcus swore that the party really was rockin’ earlier that night.
  • The only useful part of the news was a snippet from Gary Pinkel’s press conference. Then, Karen Kornacki interviewed a Fiesta Bowl official. She asked him if the KU-MU game would influence who they’d pick for their game. He was like, hello, there’s a formula (note: this is an approximation of the actual interview, since I was a bit sleepy by this point). Karen then wrangled a KU player for an interview, but a couple of sentences into it, he got pulled away from some KU authority type.

Other than that, the game was great. Let the overhype begin for next weekend’s game!


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