Best Kansas City Star Impression of The Onion

"Corn dogs still a favorite for fairgoers," August 12

Monday may be the week's slowest news day, but that doesn't mean The Kansas City Star should have buried a space-filling feature on the popularity of wieners. The August 12 story, on the back pages of the metro section, was headlined "Corn dogs still a favorite for fairgoers." One passage, which included dialogue between a corn-dog vendor and her grandson, described the breaded tube-meat dish as if it were a trapeze artist: The boy's "corn dog teetered precariously on its stick, towering taller than his head." Um, precariously? Daredevils live precariously. Corn dogs make Americans fat.
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